Susie and Noelle Meet Bikini Bottom
by secret potted plant
Summary: Two monsters. Two worlds. One Krusty Krab. This is their tale, and this is their story.
1. Chapter 1

"...so, in order to add, we first need to find the least common denominator of both fractions. So..."

 **SLAM!**

The whole class turned their heads, Susie standing in the middle of the doorframe.

"Oh, Susie!" Alphys began. "Late again, I see... well, just take a seat, and we will-"

 **SKRCHCK!**

"Drat! The chalk broke!" Alphys sighed. "Susie, since you came late, why don't you grab more chalk?"

Susie shrugged. "Students can't go out without a partner."

"Oh, you're right! Class, who wants to go out with Susie?"

The class stood in silence for a few moments, before a lone girl in the corner shot her hand up. "I can go with her!"

"Oh, Noelle! Yes, you two go grab the chalk out of the supply closet!"

Noelle jumped out of her seat and tottered over to Susie. "And make sure to come back quickly, too!" Alphys yelled as they both walked out of the classroom, the door closing behind them.

Susie slammed a locker with her fist. "Dammit! I thought that would work!" She turned to face Noelle, who looked back meekly, covering the bottom of her face with a textbook. "Whatever, let's this get over with quick."

She looked around. "Now where the hell is the supply closet..."

Noelle perked up. "Oh, over here! F-follow me!"

The two turned a corner and walked down the hallway to the closet, the interior of which was completely dark.

"Hey, where the hell is the light switch in here?!"

"It should be at the end..."

They walked further into the room.

"Hey, how friggin' long is this closet?"

They walked further and further, until the light from the doorway was a mere blip.

"Y'know what, Noelle, if we haven't found it now we're not gonna find it soon. Let's blow this popsicle stand."

Susie began to lead the two back, until...

"What the hell? The ground's starting to sh- **AAUUGGGHH**!"

* * *

"I don't understand it!" Mr. Krabs pressed his face against the window of the restaurant. "We haven't had any customers for the past 2 weeks!"

Squidward sighed, leaning his head against his hand. "MAYBE you could stop overcharging people for mediocre fast food..."

"Nonsense, me boy!"

Spongebob shot his head through the back window. "Maybe it's the winter that's keeping everyone in their homes!"

"...aaaaaAAAAAA **AAAAUUUUGHHH**!"

Susie and Noelle crashed through the ceiling of the Krusty Krab, landing hard on the ground.

"Urgh..." Susie weakly pushed herself off the ground. "Where am I?..."

"Ack! Argh!" Noelle grabbed her throat. "Oxygen! I need oxygen!"

Susie's eyes opened in shock. She jumped to grab Noelle. "Someone! Someone help her!" She held Noelle under her jacket, helping her hold her breath under the oppressive aquatic atmosphere.

Spongebob popped back up from the back room, holding a pickle jar. "Go long!"

He tossed the jar, and Susie expertly caught it, quickly shoving it on top of Noelle's head.

"Hooray!" went everyone in unison.

...

"Wait, who are these people?" Spongebob asked.

"Why, they're our new staff, me boy! I've been thinking we needed some new blood around here!" He hugged the two monsters tightly against his chest. "From now on, you and Spongebob will be taking half the day off, and these girls will be working the night shift!"

Noelle gasped. "Th-th-the night shift?!"

"That's right! And you," he plopped a hat on her, "will be our frycook!"

"Well, what about Susie?"

"Why, she will be the cashier!"

Squidward beamed, jumping out of his boat-shaped workstation. "Why, don't mind if I let her begin her first shift!" He walked out the doors. "Seeya, folks!"

Spongebob slowly followed out on his knees, tears forming at the edges of his eyes. "This doesn't mean I've gotten worse at cooking?"

Krabs knelt down and grabbed him by the shoulder. "My boy, you've provided me nothing but quality work ever since you began working here. Go on, get some rest, Spongeboy, me Bob!"

Spongebob saluted. "Aye-aye, captain!" he said, dashing out of the building.

Mr. Krabs waved at him as he ran off until he disappeared into the horizon, turning back to make eye contact with Susie and Noelle looking bored and standing around.

"Aye, I don't pay you guys to lollygag! GET TO WORK!"

Noelle yelped and dashed off to the back, while Susie lazily followed behind. "Man, what did I get myself into..."

* * *

 _ding ding ding_!

Noelle shrieked. "A new customer!"

A blue fish walked up to the cashier's desk. "Hey, can I have a Krabby Patty Deluxe with extra cheese?"

Susie reached her head back into the cooking area. "Hey, Noelle, this guy says he wants a Crappy Patty Deluxe with extra cheese or whatever."

"Uh, how do you make that?"

"Beats me. Just improvise something."

Noelle backed away and looked at the array of ingredients on the wall. "Alright, so let's see, uh... two buns, lettuce, tomato..."

Susie turned back to the customer.

"So, uh... nice weather we're having, huh?"

"Beats me. I don't even think they have weather underwater."

Noelle popped out the back. "One Krampy Patty Deluxe with extra cheese, on the spot!"

Susie grabbed it and half-heartedly tossed it to the customer. "That'll be $3.99, sir."

The fish took a big bite out of the burger, spending a few slowly chewing the burger and relishing it's flavor. "Say... this is amazing! I've never eaten anything like this before!"

Noelle smiled. "So it was good?"

"More than good! In fact, I might come back tomorrow to buy another one of these!"

Mr. Krabs jumped out of his chair into the dining room, embracing both of them tightly. "Ya-hoo-ieee, I knew you lasses would do a good job! In fact, as a reward for your hard work, I'll be giving you your paychecks early!"

He handed them both a letter. Susie eagerly opened her's up, but frowned when she opened it up. "Five bucks? I can get more of that just by scraping for change people dropped on the floor!"

Mr. Krabs walked back into his office. "Keep up the good work, ladies!"

Susie slammed the cash register. "Damn good-for-nothing capitalist cheapskate! Now I'm gonna trapped underwater for the rest of my life serving some scummy businessman! Piss!" She kicked the boat-shaped workstation, hard. "Ow, ow, ow! That hurt!"

"Well, think of it this way, Susie," she leaned against the windowframe separating the two, "it could be worse."

Susie gave her a derisive glare. "How so."

"Well... you could've dropped down here alone, without me."

"What difference does that make?"

"Well, you'd be a lot more lonely right?"

"Psssh. No one talks to me anyways." She turned away, looking down and fiddling with the cash register.

"Yeah, but, like, you wouldn't have anyone to talk to, and, like... we're talking right now, aren't we?"

Susie paused for a moment, and sighed. "I guess that's true..." She continued messing with the cash register, accidentally pressing the button that makes the drawer pop out. "Augh!" She jumped back in alarm.

Noelle chuckled, Susie quickly gaining her composure. "Hey, don't laugh! I'm on the edge!"

"Haha, I'm sorry... I've just never seen you so startled..."

Susie crossed her arms and leaned against the wall. "Whatever... I guess the good thing about working the night shift is that not many people are gonna come by..."

The water outside began to turn pitch black, evening turning to stark night. A few bubbles formed and disappeared, their activity producing the only noise amongst the silent atmosphere.


	2. Chapter 2

"Zzzzzzzzzz..."

The duo were both conked out, Susie curling herself up on the bottom of the boat-shaped workstation. Light slowly began to rise behind the mountains of coral surrounding the area, the day quickly approaching.

Noelle raised her head up from the grill. "M-morning already...?" She jumped out through the window and grabbed Susie by the hand. "Susie! Susie! Wake up, our shift is over!"

"H-huh..."

At that moment, Spongebob and Squidward walked through the front doors, Spongebob skipping in the building with a smile on his face, and Squidward sluggishly limping behind.

"I was not looking forward to coming back to this..." he groaned as he checked in.

"Hwuh?" Susie finally rose from her nest. "Aw, you guys woke me up in middle of a nice dream!"

Squidward opened the door to the boat-shaped workstation, stepping one tentacle in. "Hey, get out of the way so I can get to work." He smirked. "Or actually, don't."

Susie yawned. "Oh man, are we done already?" She jumped out the side of the boat-shaped workstation, flipping back through her paycheck. "Five dollars to sit around doing nothing all night... yaknow what, Noelle, working here may not be so bad after all."

Squidward crossed his arms. "Hrnn."

"C'mon," Susie gestured to Noelle, "let's get outta here."

"WAAAAIIIIIIIIIT!" Spongebob dashed out to the front. "Let me show you around town so you get a feel for Bikini Bottom!"

* * *

"So here's where me, Squidward, and my friend Patrick live!" Spongebob said as they passed by the street they lived on.

"Squidward lives in a tiki face? Weird." Noelle remarked.

"A giant pineapple under the sea? What will they think of next?!" said Susie.

"And over here on the other side is Mrs. Puff's Boating School! She's a hard teacher, but it just makes us better students in the end!"

Noelle smiled. "Neaaat."

"And that's Sandy's house over there! She lives in a dome because she's a land creature like you."

Spongebob checked his watch. "Uh-oh. I have to head back to work, seeya both later!" Not a second later, he disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

Susie coughed, waving the dust from her face. "Thank God that guy is gone. All that walking made my left ass hurt."

Noelle turned the valve on the front door, entering the hall bridging the outdoor sea to Sandy's dome. "Let's see if she will let us stay with her for a while," she said as she knocked on the door to the dome.

Just a few seconds later a bipedal squirrel opened the door. "Howdy y'all! My name's Sandy Cheeks!" She put her hand on her chin. "Say, you two don't look like sea critters."

"Oh, we fell from a hole in the sky, or something like that." Noelle stated, pointing to her pickle jar. "See? Pickle jar."

"Hmm, y'all are gonna need something more durable than that to survive down here long term." She guided them towards the tree in the center, pulling two glass helmets out of a box. "Here ya kids go!" she said, plopping the helmet on Noelle's head.

She turned to Susie but developed a quizzical expression. "Wait a minute, how come you are doing all fine?" Susie opened to mouth to respond but Sandy cut her off. "Oh, I get it, you're an alligator, you don't oxygen to breathe."

"No, actually I'm a weird horse." Susie smiled, flashing her yellow teeth. "I can just hold my breath for a really long time."

* * *

"Well, it's getting pretty late, Sandy, I think we should head back off." Noelle said, standing up and dusting her dress off.

Susie raised her head up from a log she was laying on. "Oh thank God, you guys are finally done..."

"Aw, no problem, squirt!" she yelled. "Come back whenever you wanna!"

"Sure thing, pal!" Noelle waved back, her and Susie leaving in haste.

Susie closed the door behind them. "So, uh... where do we head back off to...?"

* * *

 **knock knock knock**!

Spongebob opened the door, holding a candle in his left arm. "Yes?"

"Hey," Susie poked her head through, "can we bunk?"

"Hmm," Spongebob scratched the side of his head, "I'd love to, but I'm afraid I don't have any space. How about staying with Patrick?"

Patrick opened his rock. "C'mon in, the water's warm!"

Susie glared at Patrick and then turned back to Spongebob. "No."

"Well, how about Squidward? He has lots of space in his house, and I imagine if he just had a few friends he wouldn't be so grumpy all the time!"

Noelle poked her head under Susie's. "That sounds good!"

"Yeah, seeya!" Susie said, closing the door.

The two tip-toed off to Squidward's house, Noelle gently opening the front door.

"Hmm... no one's in here..." Noelle stated, peeking around.

Susie observed the surroundings, fixating on the wall decorations. "Wow, what's with all these weird paintings he has around here?"

Noelle stepped into the hallway, opening a crusty, rusted door. "Hey, Susie!" Noelle called, dust billowing into her face. "I found a - **hackk!** \- spare room!"

In a flash Susie ran through the doorway, almost knocking Noelle over, jumping onto the bed. "Finally! Aight, goodnight, Noelle!"

Noelle gently slid under the covers next to her. "You wont mind me sleeping next to you, right?"

Susie half-turned to her. "Huh? Well, I guess not... just don't kick me or snore too loudly, capiche?"

Noelle giggled. "Don't worry, I'm a quiet sleeper."

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, a tiny organism shot his eye open from sleep. "Something odd is afoot, something evil..." The creature sat up, gleefully rubbing his hands together and laughing in wicked joy. "And I like the way that sounds!"


End file.
